Not every day someones title has me scratching all three nuts in bewilderment. But "Dumb Flashlight with Cow Tits" is a choice. Not even all 32 volumes of Encyclopedia Britannica are any help and my disappointment is immeasurable.
An avalanche of tits that the most experienced mountain climbers would struggle with. Pair that with a gash that doesn't look like it's been one of the victims of Haddonfield and you're working with some triple A prime beef slab my friend.
Is it me or is it kinda weird when OF girls start collabing? Like what the fuck is the intro message for this behavior? "wanna fly in to our state so we can share a plate of my boyfriend's asshole and charge people $27 dollars a month to watch?"
Her [entire ] is bizarre imo. She clearly has an affinity for being POV-defiled inside the mudd trumpet but can't be arsed to spend more than $14.oo (USD) on a better quality camera. Black Friday Pofegistka, mark your calendar.
Harry Hipster and his double-F sized bunkmate channel their inner 2009 vlog creator and bring us a side of am-porn nobody asked for. You'll have to improvise the aroma of cedarwood and deep fried asshole to really hammer this one home.
"Uber rideshare is a service where everyday drivers use their own personal cars to give people rides. You request, track, and pay for a ride using a smartphone app. There is also an option called Uber Share where you split a car with strangers."
Stewart and his local Dungeons and Dragons chapter approach your wife with their war drums out, looking for an impromptu handicap match. What do you do?
Honestly, I'm shocked. And by shocked I mean quietly contemplating how much longer it will take social media to completely remove all empathetic reasoning from the human genome. Direct all your body fluids accordingly. More [here]
We've [seen] this [girl] before. And 27 million collective views later it seems she still hasn't figured out what a carbohydrate is. Prince Devitt would be vry proud.
Imagine coming home during the witching hour only to find your significant other kneeling down, thorax-deep on Jamal's chopped cheese. (The Harlem original)
If her facial expressions look familiar to you, then you too have felt the sweet kiss of Red Lobster's endless shrimp platter. A feeling taken from us all way too soon...
Booty blasted before getting down her first bowl of Apple Jacks for the day and completely proud of it. Since this behavior doesn't show signs of stopping any time soon, here's a free tip lady: Start wiping front to back from now on. Trust me.
Not everyone has this kind of affinity for high prioritizing siphoning the python over a meaningful long lasting relationship. That's cuz not everyone is this girl.
Congratulations to the golden glove duo working that dude's bag like a 19th century gandy dancer (look it up). Homie may have survived all 9 rounds, but he'll never be able to eat applesauce without a war zone flashback ever again.
